“Getting a divorce is a horrible thing. It’s just painful. It’s awful when you realise you need one,” she said.

However, she admitted she has since felt better. “It has been wonderful. I’ll just leave it there,” she said. “I live in a neighborhood. Now I can walk to little stores. I can walk to the drugstore, I can walk to a restaurant. I absolutely love it.”

French Gates’ experiences offer a poignant reminder of the universal challenges faced by those emerging from the ashes of a broken marriage, trying to rebuild their lives post-divorce.

Gurleen Baruah, organizational psychologist and executive coach at That Culture Thing, says, “Navigating the emotional aftermath of a divorce requires patience and self-compassion.”

Strategies to pave the path towards rebuilding your life

Allow yourself to grieve: It’s normal to feel a range of intense emotions, from sadness to anger. Give yourself permission to cry, vent, or simply sit with your feelings. Grieving is a natural part of the healing process.

Seek support from others: Lean on friends and family who can offer a listening ear or a shoulder to cry on. Professional support from a therapist can also provide valuable guidance. Joining a support group can connect you with others who understand what you’re going through.

Don’t neglect self-care: Prioritise your physical and mental health. Eat nutritious meals, exercise regularly, and ensure you get enough rest. Engaging in activities that bring you joy, such as reading, gardening, or crafting, can be incredibly soothing and help you focus on yourself. It also leads to healing and getting in touch with self-priorities and needs.

Establish a routine: Maintaining a regular schedule can provide a sense of normalcy and stability. Simple routines like morning walks, regular meal times, and consistent bedtimes can help ground you during this tumultuous period.

Set small goals: Break down your tasks into manageable steps. Whether it’s reorganising a room, learning a new skill, or even just getting through a workday, achieving small goals can provide a sense of accomplishment and progress.

Reflect and learn: Take time to think about what you’ve learned from your relationship and the divorce. Understanding these lessons can foster personal growth and help you make more informed decisions in the future.

Focus on the positive: Identify new opportunities and rediscover old hobbies that you enjoy. This can be a time to pursue interests or passions you might have set aside. Embrace the chance to redefine your life and find new sources of happiness.

How can someone find closure and move forward after a divorce?

Baruah recommends acknowledging and accepting the range of emotions you’re experiencing as natural responses to a significant life change. “Avoid suppressing feelings; instead, allow yourself to process them gradually.”

She says, “Practice forgiveness, both towards your ex-partner and yourself. Holding onto resentment can hinder closure. Recognise that forgiveness is a process that may take time but is crucial for emotional healing.”

Rewrite your personal narrative post-divorce, focusing on resilience, personal growth, and new opportunities. Reframe challenges as opportunities for positive change.

Finally, set clear boundaries with your ex-partner and others involved in your life. Prioritise self-care activities that nurture your physical, emotional, and mental well-being, such as exercise, therapy, hobbies, or spending time with supportive friends and family.