I had woken up the previous day feeling a bit of numbness in my left arm, characteristically, I ignored it believing that it was nothing to be worried about, typical African man, you will say. I did not think anything of it. Of course, stroke was the last thing on my mind. I have always considered myself to be healthy, well so I thought, I mean I was full of life, football crazy, party loving, church going, always hanging out with the boys etc. You can imagine my surprise when I was finally hit by it. Apart from that, I have never seen anyone struck by it, so it was impossible for me to know the tell -tale signs to look out for, but more importantly, I see it as an illness for the elderly, those in their seventies, eighties etc., and here I was, a man in his fifties, vibrant and full of life only to be struck by a stroke. I later learnt that if I had gone to an A&E when I noticed the numbness, it would have been reversed.

Meanwhile, earlier in my adult life, I had been diagnosed with High blood pressure and was put on some medications and here I must make a true confession, I have not always been ‘faithful’ to my medications, despite warnings from my GP, I could go on days without remembering to take them. I know better now.

So inspite of the numbness, I still went to work and it was at work that I began to feel the impact of what had happened to me. I could not use my workstation and at every point, I struggled to stay on my feet, there was this constant risk of falling. I later learnt that this was one of the symptoms of a stroke. So I went through the day in the most uncomfortable way.

I eventually closed for the day and it was at home that the story took a new turn…

First, I fell as I was getting into my apartment and pleas from my neighbours, a young couple, to call an ambulance fell on deaf ears, as I felt there was no need for one, I believed nothing untoward was wrong with me.

I went to bed after a hurried dinner and surprisingly, I had a sound sleep till I was woken up around 01:30am because of the urge to visit the loo and this was when the drama really began… I found that I couldn’t move my left leg and hand, they had become paralysed and believe me, I had to pee on the bed. I felt relived at this stage, but I still couldn’t get up.

I have always kept my phone by my bedside whenever I went to sleep and this really came in handy at a very critical time. Luckily, my right hand was still functional and this was very fortuitous, because I later learnt that if I had continued sleeping, the situation would have been much worse. So, I began to work the phone, ordinarily, one would have expected me to call the ambulance service or 999 as we are wont to do here, rather I called others, my friends, especially those in the medical field. Unfortunately, with the exception of my classmate and bosom friend of over 40 years, Gboyega Akinlude, no one else answered their phone for an obvious reason, which could be understood, people were sleeping at this time. It was some minutes to 2 o’clock in the morning.

Gboyega, who was at the time still awake with his wife, Peju, quickly turned the call into a video call because they felt uncomfortable with my speech which had become slurred at this time. Again, they later told me this that my head had tilted to one side. So they suggested I call an ambulance and that they were on their way to my house. This time I had no choice. Imagine, this is what I should have done over 24 hours earlier before the stroke eventually struck. Stubborn man, you will say.

The call to the ambulance services took a couple of minutes, but I could not tell them what was wrong with me because I didn’t really know, I just told them I had lost the use of my limbs, and that I couldn’t get up from the bed. I guess they immediately knew what the problem was, they just advised that I should not move to prevent falling.

The ambulance arrived about 10-15 minutes after the call, their arrival fortuitously coinciding with Gboyega’s arrival made it easier for them to get to my house which was located within an estate. He was the one who eventually opened door for them.

For the first time since the whole incident started, I became really afraid for my life. My blood pressure had risen to about 200/100 or even higher, but I remained calm and just kept saying to myself in my native Yoruba language ‘Oluwa sanu fun mi’ (Lord, have mercy on me), while the thought of my family kept playing in my mind. Eventually, I was moved into the ambulance and thus began a three-month sojourn at two hospitals, first at the Kings College Hospital where the initial diagnosis and tests were carried out and Lewisham Hospital where I underwent the rehabilitation stage of my treatment.

At this juncture, I will like to thank God for giving me a second chance at life, because really anything could have happened that morning, but He chose to preserve my life and I am indeed very grateful. Though, the doctors told me it was a mild stroke as none of my cognitive functions were affected, anything could still have happened. The stroke only affected my mobility which, to the glory of God, I am beginning to regain, albeit slowly.

I cannot complete this write up without mentioning some great people who were there for me throughout my travail. Gboyega Akinlude and his wife, Peju, who I now refer to jokingly as my first responders, were there for me from that morning till I was discharged from the hospital. It is on record that Gboyga visited the hospital virtually every day, he would usually come from work and stay till when visitors were asked to leave. He provided the needed support as I healed. I was moved to tears when he told me it would have taken a lot out of him to continue if anything untoward had happened to me. I understood this outpouring of emotions. It was the same weekend that we lost two members of our Reunion group of CMS Grammar School, one of whom was our bosom friend (Yemi Fakayejo). It was one weekend Grammarians will not forget in a hurry.

My Pastor, his wife and the entire congregation of RCCG, Good news Haven, Thamesmead, London played a significant role in my healing process. Their prayers, visits and gifts lifted my spirit and I am very grateful. God bless you all.

Members of the Old Grammarians Society (UK/Europe) of CMS Grammar School, ‘my primary constituency’, were all there for me. Your gists and banters during your numerous visits in no small measure aided my recovery process. I may not be able to mention names here, but you were all there for me and I appreciate you all. A jo se wa o ni baje. UP School, UP Boys.

Members of the Old Girls Association, Lagos Anglican Girls Grammar School (UK/Ireland) also stood by me during this time. I appreciate your visits and gifts which always came in handy whenever their members visited. Mention must be made of the following ladies- Tutu Joshua, Tayo Akhionbare, Toyin Odumosu, Liz Bart Williams, Lola Awosika, Funmi Osanyinjobi and their President, Tina Makasay, Thank you ladies. I appreciate you all. God will continue to meet you at the point of your needs. E se gan.

Finally, I thank members of the Old girls’ association of the Eva Adelaja Girls Secondary Grammar School led by Sade Ope. They came in after my discharge and they have been very supportive. I thank you ladies, God will replenish your pockets a million fold in Jesus Name. God bless you all.

To all my other friends too numerous to mention here, I also thank you. We will not spend our days in sickness in Jesus name.

Thank you for reading this epistle.

Tunde Tabi, London, 2024

Tunde can be reached through [email protected]