Damn, y’all! Lily Allen is savage! This is some Game Of Thrones level planning!
The Smile singer opened up to Miss Me? co-host Miquita Oliver on Sunday about an old celebrity feud — and the cold ass revenge she got on her A-list rival! In a podcast episode devoted to revenge, Lily called way back to the year 2009 and her feud with a big star. She wouldn’t say who this person was, but she did give some hints. She described the woman as “incredibly beautiful”, as well as a “lot older” and “more successful” than Lily.
Hmm. That doesn’t narrow it down enough, but we do think we’ve got this one figured out. More on that later.
Lily explained she was staying at Elton John‘s house in the South of France for a while that year. She was 24 and dealing with drinking too much. Elton, famously sober for over a decade already by then, was helping out. It was it his house where she had a run-in with this other star:
“While I was there, I got a phone call from somebody very famous at the time asking me if I could perform at a charity event that they were involved in. She was asking me to sing a song with her boyfriend, who was a musician.”
Boyfriend who was a musician in 2009. Another clue. Got it. Lily continued:
“I said, ‘I’d love to but it’s next week and I haven’t got any time to rehearse because I’m in the South of France.’ She was like, ‘Don’t worry, we’ll come out there and we’ll rehearse with you.'”
So the couple makes the journey to Elton’s house, and a still-reluctant Lily kind of hems and haws about which song she’ll sing with the boyfriend, eventually settling on Something Stupid, the old standard love song duet. You know, with the really cute chorus of:
“And then I go and spoil it all / By saying something stupid like, ‘I love you'”
That song choice may have spurred something in the girlfriend, who had suggested they do Simon & Garfunkel‘s far less romantic The Sound of Silence. Because what Lily says happened next is wild!
“I said, ‘Look, I’ll go downstairs with your boyfriend and we’ll practice the song and then we’ll come up and then we’ll sing it for you and see how you feel about it.’ And she grabbed my arm and she said, ‘If you think I’m leaving you alone with my f**king boyfriend you’ve got another thing coming.'”
WHOA!
“I was on my own in this house and it was the two of them and just me, and she was quite a lot older than me, and a lot more famous and more successful, and I just thought, ‘I’m stranded and you’ve got me snookered.'”
Lily makes very clear, even all these years later, she was so NOT trying to steal this man!
“Her boyfriend was not someone I found remotely attractive and she was incredibly beautiful — still is — and so should not have found me remotely a threat. I was definitely in my like puffy strung out phase.”
We think Lily is selling herself short, but still, she just did whatever the star said. But she didn’t forget the way she’d been treated!
“I was like, ‘I’m banking this feeling and I will remember it, and I will get you back one day.'”
The charity event in London went really well, but Lily notes the star “never said thank you for my involvement.” Mm-hmm. But it didn’t take long for her to get an opportunity to get her revenge:
“A couple of weeks later, I got asked by an awards ceremony if I would be the recipient of a very prestigious award. I said, ‘Yes, thank you so much, that’s very nice.’ And then they said, ‘Is there anybody that you would like to present you with the said award?’ I was like, ‘At what point in the proceedings does this award get awarded?’ And they were like, ‘It’s the penultimate award.'”
That got the wheels turning…
“I was like, ‘There is no way this person will be able to hold themselves together for that long and if I can stay sober then she’ll have to present me with the award when I’m looking pristine and brilliant and she looks completely f**ked.'”
DAMN! Absolute savage!
“And it f**king worked. Front cover of the papers the next day were like, ‘So and so was a complete mess,’ and then pictures of me with my award.”
Wow. Do NOT piss off Lily Allen, right?
BTW, let’s get back to which A-lister Lily is talking about… Now that we have the story, it’s not hard to do some cross-referencing. And here’s what we know.
Lily Allen was presented the Woman of the Year award at the 2009 GQ Men of the Year Awards. Also at that event? Her “friend” Kate Moss. Kate was at the ceremony with her then-boyfriend Jamie Hince, the singer-guitarist from The Kills. Musician boyfriend.
And in pics at the end of the night, Kate isn’t exactly looking like her most poised self.
Whereas Lily is looking fresh, without having had a drop!
Just like Lily described, DailyMail.com even captioned their photo of the two of them standing together:
“Lily and her Woman of the Year gong are joined by a dishevelled Kate Moss”
So yeah, it kiiinda seems like Kate Moss was the target of this little revenge plan. Ouch! And it was just the start of the bad blood!
In 2016, there were reports Kate was “furious” that after her split from Jamie, he was photographed having a laugh with Lily! Now of course, she says she never had her sights on the man, but these pics say different. At least they reportedly screamed it to Kate!
Back on the podcast, Lily made clear whatever feud was going on is long over, however, saying:
“That person, I actually really like them now. It was just a particularly bad phase that both of us were going through at the time. All is forgiven on my part anyway. But she’s probably just finding out. So if you are listening and you recognise yourself in this story ‘I’m sorry.’ It was particularly petty.”
True. And brutal. And Machiavellian! Seriously, do NOT mess with this gal!